what morbid satisfaction does it give me to blog about my life? and what satisfaction does it give you to read about it?

O__o

my life is getting uber boring. it revolves around studying and eating. thats what i do all day. eat study and sleep. usually its 65% eating, 34.5% sleeping, and 0.5% studying. thats what i call balance. i dont know bout you.

it was hard telling my mother about the possibilities of me bumming at home for the first 3 months. but i got it out anyways. the disappointment in her eyes cannot be put into words. i knew then, if i dont make it, it will crush her. its too late for prelims. but never too late for Os. i need this. i need to prove to my family that im not a bummer. i will wear that JC skirt.

sometimes, it scares me. people get old [like duh syaf...]. it scares me whn i think about losing someone i love and care so much for. the one person who has given me nothing but unconditional love for the 16 yrs ive been around. is it just me or is that inexplicable sore feeling that leaves me sick to the stomach something that is telling me his time will come soon?

i love my atok bak. i love him to the core. lately, ive been thinking a lot about him. i cannot bear disappointing him. look at the time i wasted...

syaf_8:04 PM